Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
she's just sitting in a corner ripping all of the filters off her menthols
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Guess who left Professor Cunt on their paper by accident?
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
Randomize
