I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Randomize