Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
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