I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
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