It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
My mother just asked me if i ever swallow the goods...should i be concerned?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
Literally got mad at him this morning because we didn't have time to have sex for a third time. I think I'm getting greedy.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
Randomize
