Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
look, bitch. one day when everyone i care about deserts me for my severe moral depravity, you're going to be the only one i have.
i can't wait.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
