Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Snaps to my Ella Fitzgerald station for such a jazzy walk of shame
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
Sorry you uh had to see that last night. That's the problem with open fields, no privacy...
Randomize
