this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Reasons I shouldn't drink... My twitter drafts keep getting more and more emotional.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
I just crop dusted the hot FedEx guy delivering my business cards...then asked him "Was that you?" How the fuck am I allowed to be an adult?
Dad smells like hangovers and 65 years of bitterness
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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