We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
dude i feel like shit
well u did eat a lot of play-doh
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm at about main and main street
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Just wiped the ashes off my forehead before he came over to have sex. Definitely going to hell.
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
Randomize
