We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
My ATM looks so different sober.
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
There was probably a tattoo above her soulless vagina that read 'it's a trap!' Yet you ignored it
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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