Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
he asked me to put his condom on because he couldn't see without his glasses
i just recognized the girl sitting across from me from a lesbian porno... should i ask for an autograph?
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
Randomize
