I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It's amazing to think about how many Obama victory sex babies are being prevented by Obamacare free contraception.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Randomize
