I murdered the dance floor call the cops
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I told her for every minute she spent down there, I would donate a dollar to the Haiti relief fund... totally worked
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
St Patricks Day is not the day you decide to have a sober epiphany.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Wait, is this the kid that tried catching a bat in your backyard with a flashlight and a ball of tin foil?
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
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