Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
I'm sorry I kept calling last night when you wouldn't pick up. I'm REALLY sorry I sang "You Oughta Know" on more than 4 voice mails.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
