Where did you get a picture of my penis
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
