ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
When you consider the sheer number of events that had to occur in order to prevent me from fucking her, there must be a god
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
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