I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
he just chased his shot of tequila with a chicken nugget.. either its a canadian thing or hes wasted
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize