when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I just high-fived this girl after she swallowed.
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
You're asking the wrong person. I was drunk on nyquil and jager.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Randomize
