fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize