return my video game
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
Randomize