East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
I almost took a picture but it looked like he might have a shank and I'm just not at a place in my life where I could handle having tetanus
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
I passed out drunk in her bed. Her boyfriend showed up and told me to go to the other room or we were gonna have a threesome. I threw up off the side of her bed and left. I feel like that was an adequate response.
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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