considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
