my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
I want you to read this conversation tomorrow and be proud of the fact that you taught me how to decipher any drunk message. Good job.
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
