I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Can we please not be like these pathetic people in their thirties who only get drunk when they go see Sherrill Crow?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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