4:12a: just got back to his place now. I don't want to talk about it
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
No, he went to go get condoms. The least I could do was chug two beers before he got back
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize