nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
Randomize
