Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize