I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I have just disproved the common belief that it is impossible to have mediocre sex in a fire truck.
The fire in my vagina flames on. Fucking terrible firefighter
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
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