I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
If she's steering anything, it's a religious boat of crazy. Destination: Iceberg.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
Fell twice in five points. on my face. literally during a cross walk. The cars just went around me. 21st birthday memories right there
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I am mentally ready for anal.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
