I just saw a Kleenex commercial and thought about last night. I'm sorry about your hair.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Randomize
