we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
Randomize