i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
OMG - This guy with a mullet just told me - it wasn't a mullet - but his hair dresser layered it wrong. It's so walmart in here. I hate you.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
