There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Randomize
