I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
