I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
If I had your ass I would rule the world
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
Randomize
