I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
Could a canary swim?
Last time I ever let you pet sit.
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
Does anyone know why "math wizard" is written on my arm?
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I found one of your hair extensions on the dance floor. You put it back in your hair
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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