Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Who knew that being in a committed relationship is the same thing as forced celibacy? Did not sign up for this.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Randomize
