I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
I immediately knew he was tripping, he came over with a grocery bag of snow balls and a bike helmet on and asked if I was prepared to die for my country.
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
You went into my bathroom put on my bathrobe.. Said excuse me then went in my front yard and started yelling who ate my whopper..
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
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