When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
Or they can chase TEQUILA shots with it. I don't know why my phone capitalizes TEQUILA.
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Well, I'm getting my ex-boyfriend to get me a z pack to cure the chlamydia I got from my married fuck buddy so that I can fuck one of my students.
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
You're lucky you got out when you did, about an hour later the girl in the Franzia box started wrestling everyone.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
