Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
duuuude. vodka popsicles DO NOT function.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
He did not appreciate the "you did reuse the diamond" comment when looking at his new fiance's ring.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I should have known it wouldn’t work. Someone saved in her phone as “Subway Sex” called the week before the wedding
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