@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
Why isn't there a super hero that comes to the aide of really high kids when they kill their car battery?
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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