Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I think you missed the wrong class. Im pretty sure we were taught how to buy cocaine.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
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