So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Randomize
