My brain says no but my pants say off.
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
the bruises from climbing out of the window last night make sitting at my desk impossible. legit excuse to not study right?
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Randomize
