I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
and she was petting her beer can
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
bring money and cleavage
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
just found gum connecting my sunglasses to my floor board. you don't want to know where else it was.
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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