please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Randomize
