I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
My mom just admitted you were a good looking kid & if you weren't my friend & 30 years older she would do you. I'm going to commit suicide.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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