just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
I'm slowly starting to accept that you have to be a sociopath to be attracted to me
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
Randomize
