so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
I tried to be mean but not so mean that he won't bone me next weekend
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
New rock bottom. Woke up at 7 am fully clothed in a bathtub full of water. I hate myself.
Randomize
