thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Did you shave a certain someone in his sleep last night?
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
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