i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
cat food counts as protein by the way
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
This is the best 30th birthday ever. In a Motel 6 drinking a shower beer and sending slow-mo dick helicopter videos to you.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Randomize