I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
I just blew my nose and little bits of weed came out.
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
